Do you ever have moments in your adult life that take you right back to those nasty high school insecurities? Boy, every once in awhile, I do. I really miss my family and friends. I moved out of state eight years ago and I have always missed them, but each new place I move to, I have the hope that I will make some really good friends. Somehow, with each move, though, it seems harder than the last time to make close friends and with every move I become a little more lonely. My husband is great and having a baby has fulfilled me in a way that nothing else could, but I really miss having a girlfriend to talk to and do stuff with. I find myself almost comically desparate for a close friendship with another girl.
Tonight I hosted my first BBQ in Middle America. I invited all the people from my work that I am friends with and that I hope to be closer to. Of course, they all hang out with each other all the time. I had a really good time tonight and I think they all did too, but while they were all talking about their shared memories and their lunch dates, a little part of me was whimpering, "Why don't they invite me? Why don't they want to be my friend? What's wrong with me?" There is nothing that makes me feel more pathetic than being 30 years old and still desperate to belong to somebody's clique. I think if I wasn't so lonely, I wouldn't really care. At least I can hope that would be the case.
On the bright side, 2/3 of my house is now spotless. I spent 7 hours cleaning to make it that way, but that's my own fault for being a total slob. With my little boy so close to crawling, I really want to get myself on a cleaning schedule, which includes vacuuming the main areas of the house every other day. With all the pets we have, that is really a necessity. We'll see if I can actually get that going and stick to it.
Our poor puppy got really sick this week. We gave her enchiladas a couple of days ago and since then she has puked up everything she has eaten. My husband took her to the vet today, who gave her a bunch of shots and gave us two medicines and special food to feed her for at least two days. Apparently, puppy stomachs aren't made to handle Mexican food. Lesson learned.
2 comments:
Being someone that moves a lot too I understand how hard it can be to meet people and make friends. I think it will be better now that you have a kid. It really opened up people and I became part of the mommy club. Once he will do play dates, mom groups, and little league you will be making more friends.
btw, I really miss hanging out!
Big Sis,
I know what a great girlfriend you are. I was lucky to have you in my life during the formative years, and I'm SO happy we've regained that closeness. :)
Post a Comment